Thursday, January 18, 2007

Snow Bunny

This weather here is crazy and unpredictable. Last week, we enjoyed days in the 70s; today the city is blanketed in softly falling snow. I love the variety, and because it snows so infrequently here, it is a pleasant surprise.
I am not a fan of cold weather, and I wouldn’t willingly live in a place that received a lot of snowfall, but infrequent blanketings are simply lovely. I feel so cozy right now. It is warm inside, and the view outside the window is white and sparkling. I am, unfortunately, at work, and not at home in front of a fire with a book, but all the same, I feel warm and secure.
Next week Cullen and I are headed to Colorado for some skiing. Very excited. East Coast skiing just isn’t going to cut it, so we made plans to fly out west. I am hoping that we will have good ski conditions—I am not used to having to book a vacation to ski. I used to just drive home to my parent’s, and if it was good snow at the mountain, I would ski. But here—it is a bit more of an ordeal to seek out good skiing—and even that is a gamble.

I wish that I had more to write about. I have felt very un-inspired lately in my blogging. Life is rolling along in an undulating sea of contentment, but nothing has stood out so much that I feel this compulsion to articulate it to cyberworld. I feel happier right now than I can ever recall feeling—shouldn’t that inspire me to write something? My life, though, right now, is just peaceful and good, but not surging and inspiring—hence my writer’s block. I am still very happy with my job—minus some snafoos with a co-worker; I love living at my new place; my friendships here are solid and I still get in some good girl-time; I have been baking and reading again; and Cullen—things with him are just so lovely and easy and safe. He brings such joy into my life, and we fit together so well that it sometimes seems like he has always been a part of my life; I have not had to adjust or shift in any way to accommodate him into my heart. This is the first relationship for me where I have not had to deal with dissonance or justification for why I want to be with someone. Everything about him works for me, and I don’t have to explain or deal with doubt. When you know, it is just so easy that it is almost disappointing in the lack of tangibility. Lighting doesn’t flash across the sky, and I sense no physical changes in my universe. I just feel full and good. It is a feeling akin to eating a terrific meal and drinking lots of wine—my body and mind are satisfied and crave nothing; I don’t want to disrupt this state I am in.

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